Tuesday, May 03, 2011

You Know You Are a Regency Chav When....


From the Oxford English Dictionary:

Chav: Pronunciation: Brit. /tʃav/ , U.S. /tʃæv/
Etymology: Probably either < Romani čhavo unmarried Romani male, male Romani child (see ... (Show More)
Brit. slang (derogatory)

In the United Kingdom (originally the south of England): a young person of a type characterized by brash and loutish behaviour and the wearing of designer-style clothes (esp. sportswear); usually with connotations of a low social status.

1. Your brougham is up on bricks and it sports a pair of fluffy dice. After all, you are good at dice.


2. Your chesterfield is on the front lawn surrounded by garden gnomes and bottles of home made cider (yes yes, I know gnomes weren't invented until 1840, sue me.)


3. Your breeches are Burberry

4. Your Hessian boots have wheels in the bottom

5. Goldie Lookin' Chain. You have a passion for gold chains. Although this isn't necessary a pointer, as Regency Bling was pretty commonplace. Men would wear one or often many, watch fobs and chains around the waist

6. You find yourself waving your hand and saying "It is because I'z a Earl, innit?" when a young lady refuses you.

7. You drive around in your barouche with musicians perching on the back, but only the double bass players for maximum vibration.

8. A storm blows through your neighbourhood, doing £30,000 of improvement to your mansion

9. You have your title tattoed on your arm.


10. And "Mama" on the other arm.

11. You wear your top hat sideways .

12. You post your letters on a pay as you go basis on vodapost

13. You and your fellow aristos hang around the Isis, binge drinking

14. You have go-faster stripes and a spoiler on the barouche

15. You get an ASBO for asking a lady to dance more than twice.

Can you think of any more? I'd love to hear your ideas! Thanks for reading. Many thanks to Chris Smith for the Brougham manip.

Erastes
www.erastes.com


Erastes writes gay historicals, and her first book for Carina is "The Muffled Drum" (set during the Austro Prussian War) and will be out in July 2011. It's full of soldiers, horses, angsty love, drawers and many many buttons.



12 comments:

Cindy Spencer Pape said...

Fun! Great post, Erastes!

Lee Rowan said...

ROTFLMAO!

What HAVE you got in that snuffbox?

Gehayi said...

Funny! I especially like the Burberry breeches and the brougham with the fuzzy dice.

Wendy Soliman said...

Ha ha, very funny! How about a Croydon facelife? You know, hair pulled back so tight that it saves going under the knife.

Lynne Connolly said...

Brilliant, love it!
Maybe - "You going clubbing after?" to a fellow aristo at the stuffiest ball of the season.

Erastes said...

Thank you, Lynne, Wendy, Gehayi, Lee and Cindy. It was fun to do. The burberry breeches are REAL which made me laugh a lot.

Shelley Munro said...

Fun post. I loved the burberry breeches too :)

Susanna Fraser said...

I'd be out of my depth trying to think of Regency chav identifiers, but I could do Regency rednecks. Of course, "if your family tree doesn't fork" is at least as good an identifier of aristocracy as redneckness. :-)

Amber Green said...

You've smacked ten men with your glove, but never stay sober enough to find the dueling ground before you go to bed at dawn.

Ruth said...

What a fun post. Thanks so much. I'm still laughing at the fuzzy dice!

Claire Robyns said...

Hmmm, I'd totally go for the boots on wheels, lol. Love your cover, btw

Erastes said...

Thank you, Shelley!

Susanna - you are very true. Just as much inbreeding there, it's just done with everything written down!

Amber- true! I love the idea of them staggering around forgetting what they've done!

Thank you, Ruth!

Claire, You can actually get them - altough a little less elegant than Hessian!

http://www.gpwheels.co.uk/product_images/f/spada_boots_st1_wp__85235.jpg

and thank you - i'm hugely thrilled with the cover they've done.